http://attrition.org/postal/

E-mailer: "I need your help to gain access to an email account, can you help?"

Lyger: "That depends. What are the details?"

E-mailer: "Details: (target address) ... wat other information do u require to help me?"

Lyger: "What is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?"

E-mailer: "excuse me? I am sorry but do u want to help me or not?"

Lyger: "Well, you have to know these things when you're a king, you know."

E-mailer: "arite, so I am no king. now can you pls tell me if you can help me crack this email?"

Lyger: "Listen, strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony."

E-mailer: "i think u r in no mood to help, sorry i bothered u."